Robert Reiss Travel Blog and Other Ramblings

Today we leave the heat and flies behind when we go to Cairns (pronounced “Cans”) later today. But first a word in defense of the flies. We were told by one of our guides (Ivor) that the flies act as an exfoliate by removing dead skin. Suddenly these little buggers seemed less onerous. I did notice, although Ivor is not my type, he did seem to have pristine skin. Maybe I misjudged the flies? Possibly I should have embraced the guys (and gals, I assume there are some of each) and let them have at me. If I let them clean up my skin I could look a few years younger when I get home. Then Patrice asked a very good question, “When there is a proliferation of an organism in an environment there is typically a purpose for this occurrence. What would be the explanation for the large number of flies?” Ivor then told us that since there are so many wild camels in Australia the flies are needed to process the camel dung to let it nourish the soil. Suddenly my idea for a free facial seemed a lot less appealing.

This morning we had a great breakfast at the hotel. It was a buffet and we were given the choice of eggs (poached, fried, boiled, sunny side up or Eggs Benedict). Another option was omelette with the usual variety of ingredients. French toast or pancakes were also a possibility. I opted for the Benedict (I had a great omelette yesterday). In addition they had all sorts of meats, dumplings (yes dumplings), fresh fruit and pastries.

Our flight leaves at 2:35 pm; we arrive 2 and a half hours later at 5:35 pm. No my math skills are not failing me. When we arrive in Cairns from Ayers Rock we lose 30 minutes. Yes, I am not kidding. When we left Melbourne and arrived in Alice Springs we gained 90 minutes. Uluru/Ayers Rock and Alice Springs are in the same time zone so we are giving back 30 minutes today. We will give the other 60 minutes back when we go to Sydney. I was told there are 8 time zones in Australia. I just looked it up and only found 7. Possibly the discrepancy arises because not all areas use Daylight Saving Time. If you think the 30 minute offset is odd, they also have one that has a 15 minute offset. The town of Eucla (No, that is not UCLA’s electronic online school. That would be all caps with a hyphen, E-UCLA, if it existed at all) is currently 45 minutes behind us. Sorry I don’t have an explanation why Eucla has this odd time zone but we have been here long enough so I can answer like an Australian, “No Worries”.

We still have a few hours until we leave for Cairns and Patrice is interested in going to see some camels. Apparently we need to take a shuttle and the service doesn’t start until 10:30. The current temperature is only 85 degrees but we are moving rapidly toward today’s high of 103. In addition to the heat I am sure that if there are camels, there will be flies. What is wrong with this woman? I guess I will need to just grin and bear it. How does the expression go……. “Happy wife …… means camels, heat and flies”

Patrice here now. I am sure you already know that Robert writes his blog and then gives it to me to proofread. Sometimes I find it fitting to make an addition of my own, without his knowledge or approval. This is one of those times. I feel it is necessary to come to the defense of the flies. Shortly after arrival Robert took a couple of flies in the month. Since then he has rarely opened his mouth. It has been heaven.

By the way, the sweets and dumplings were on Robert’s plate and he ate all of them.

Yesterday was our day to see “The Rock”. Patrice was very disappointed because she thought we were about to see:

Instead we went to see Uluru, formerly called Ayers Rock but affectionately referred to as “The Rock”.

Those of us in California know the former federal prison, Alcatraz Island, as the Rock but this is much different. If forced to spend time here without a fly net it would make serving time on Alcatraz seem like going to summer camp. I really enjoyed seeing the enormous sandstone formation but heat and flies made it difficult to appreciate the sight and the information our guides were telling us.

This morning we were given an opportunity to see the sunrise at Uluru but had to leave the hotel by 5:45 am. This was a real sacrifice for Patrice since she is a great sleeper. Since I rarely sleep more than 7 hours it was no problem for me. I really appreciate her efforts and we were rewarded with a beautiful sunrise.

But at the Sunrise viewing it was where our OAT guide, Darrin, showed the value of his great experience. No, it was not all the incredible facts about Uluru or the indigenous people. No it was not the incredible viewing spot he found for us nor was it all the incredible photos he has taken for us. No, it was not all the wonderful astronomy information and star identification he supplied us while on our way to the viewing location. No, it was something much more important than all of that. On our way to Uluru, Darrin told us sunrise would be at 6:43 am and not much would be worth seeing shortly after that. So if we could all be back on the bus by 6:50 AM we could return to the hotel and be first in line for the spectacular hotel breakfast buffet. So while Patrice and I were enjoying our omelettes we saw a long line of people waiting to be seated. Please let me paraphrase Bill Bryson when I say about Darrin, “You just have to love this guy”.

As I am writing we are waiting for our flight to Uluru (previously called Ayers Rock) and not a moment too soon. I don’t want you to get the wrong idea, we are having a good time on this trip (Darrin, our guide, has made sure of that) but Alice Springs is unbearable (heat and flies) but it hasn’t all been bad.

For example we had a fun time in town where we attended the gay pride parade. We even saw some police officers supportive of the movement and marching in the parade.

The cultural sights were hard to enjoy because of the intense heat and plethora of flies. I did have an interesting sighting in the shopping mall men’s bathroom.

Thanks to our travel-mate, Joan, I got this photo from the lady’s room.

We did manage to find a great place for ice cream. No matter how uncomfortable I am, a little comfort food helps to ease the pain. Speaking of comfort food we had a great meal at the hotel restaurant. It is called Hanunam and is billed as a Thai-Indian restaurant. Patrice had her favorite (Pad Thai) and I had lamb korma (an Indian dish). I hesitate to order lamb when in Los Angeles because it is tough to find good lamb in LA with tough being the key word. I thought that lamb is a big deal in Australia so I’d give it a try. When my dish arrived and I wasn’t given a knife I was very hopeful. When I realized I didn’t need a knife I was ecstatic. The dish was superb. I know you want to see pictures but I have a new camera and for some reason I can’t transfer the food photos. How about a picture of flies eating me instead?

Our flight from Alice Springs was short and very pleasant (that is if you don’t count the battle with the flies during the short walk from the terminal to the plane.) We did have some entertainment during the short walk when one of the other members of out tour group almost boarded the wrong plane. I think she might have had the right idea. She almost got on the flight to Brisbane (today’s high 88 degrees) when we landed at Uluru it was 105 degrees. Just when we thought we were leaving purgatory we realized that to the contrary, we had just arrived.

Soon after arrival we encountered flies that made number numbers in Alice Springs seem sparse. We need to get ready for our excursion to Uluru. I will check back with you tomorrow.

It was yesterday when last we spoke and I was having a wonderful time playing with the internet on our flight to Alice Springs. Things have gone a bit downhill since then. I had been told by my friend Allen that the flies can get a bit intense in this area. I also read in the Bryson book how the flies will not take no for an answer attacking your eyes, ears, mouth and any body part they can access. After a very short walk from the plane into the Alice Springs air terminal I was convinced. We gathered our luggage and headed for the tour bus to again be bombarded by the flies. They repeatedly hit me in the face and ears. My eyes were luckily protected somewhat by my sunglasses. I didn’t care about my arms or legs because of the intense facial assault. Your usually courteous Robert was moving full speed to the bus. I had no care about my fellow travelers. I pushed aside two hunched-over elderly woman for whom yesterday I had opened many doors. Then I kicked the cane from underneath one of the male passengers. I even elbowed Patrice two times in order to make it onto the bus. After everyone was on the bus and we were ready to go Darrin offered fly nets to anyone who wanted one. I screamed, “ME!!!!!” which I think caught him a bit off guard. He looked back as if expecting to see a desperate man clinging to life. And he did see that man, and it was yours truly.

Now we were on the bus heading to the hotel. So I thought. But no, Darrin had us stop at the sign welcoming us to Alice Springs. You know you are in trouble if one of the tourist sights is the welcome to the city sign. Then we headed to a memorial dedicated to Australians who had lost their lives in various wars. This was nice and the flies seemed less in abundance at that location.

Now were we headed to the hotel? No, first a stop for lunch at the Telegraph Station. We ate outside (yes battling the flies) and then took a tour learning some more information about Australian history. I would like to tell you more but at this point all I could think of was Bill Bryson’s book and the people he described who tried to traverse this desert and died. The tour was about 40 minutes but I didn’t hear very much of what was being said. All I could think of was how hot and uncomfortable I felt. At least the facial net was protecting me from the flies. Actually it provided me with some entertainment. I would wait until a couple would land on the netting in front of my mouth and then I would see how far I could catapult them with a big puff of air from my mouth. I know this sounds pathetic but I got pretty good at it.

Then finally we were back on the bus and heading to the hotel. Much to my surprise the hotel was a very nice Doubletree. I hurried in hoping I could get our key and get horizontal in a well air conditioned room. Unfortunately Darrin announced that two of the rooms were not ready yet. Was this my punishment for torturing flies?

But life returned to my body. We got into our room and it is lovely. No one is forcing me to move. I have great WiFi. Still, I am wondering what I am doing in this town. Hopefully later today will give me an answer.

Today is a travel day and we are currently aboard Qantas Airlines Flight 796 heading from Melbourne to Alice Springs. If you have read “In a Sunburned Country” by Bill Bryson you are probably aware that Alice Springs does not have a lot to offer. You might be wondering why we are going there. I am, as well. In his book, Bryson often tells of things that are very curious facts about Australia and then takes a sigh and says how much he loves this country. For example, in Melbourne there is a swimming centre (i.e. center) that is named after former Prime Minister Harold Holt who drowned to death. Let me quote Mr. Bryson, “I love this country”. If it isn’t clear already, I am using free WiFi aboard the plane! Can you hear me sigh? I love this country.

One of the things that I enjoy about travel is embracing the culture, meeting new people and trying to learn the local language. You would think the latter would not be very interesting since Australia is an English speaking nation. Well, it is quite the contrary. As I mentioned before, our tour guide, Darrin, is terrific but sometimes we are not speaking the same language. Here are some examples of things Darrin has said and what I have heard.

I heard: “Our MIT” (thinking the Australian version of MIT) Darrin said: RMIT (Royal Melbourne Institute of Technology

I heard: “Manly Bitch” Darrin said: Manly Beach

I heard: “Shit paddock” (referring to Melbourne in 1835) Darrin said: Sheep paddock.

I heard multiple times: “We are all sortied” (Excuse me?). Darrin said: We are all sorted (i.e. organized)

I heard: “Your recatella” (whatever that is). Darrin said: Eureka tower (also know as Eureka Skydeck which was fantastic)

And my favorite: I heard: “Sean Penn” Darrin said: Swamp hen (seen at the Wild Life Sanctuary).

But I diverge too much; let’s get back to the flight. We boarded a little late but the process went very quickly. Much to my surprise they offered us something to eat. You would never have that happen in the States unless you were ready to cough up about $15 for something awful to eat.

We were offered a choice of “Smoked Ham with Mustard Cheese Sauce on a Baguette” or “Mac and Cheese Frittata with Bacon”. Both sounded wonderful but it became obvious that Qantas is not trying to lure the Orthodox Jewish clientele. The meals weren’t bad even if they did lack something in aesthetics.

In addition to the food, Patrice also got some utensils which included a fork, knife and this thing.

So far the food, off the plane has not been much better than the food on the plane. With the noted exception of the incredible meal we had at Helen and Robin’s home in Melbourne and yesterday’s lunch when we ate at Supernormal (180 Flinders Lane, Melbourne VIC 3000). The restaurant was recommended by Fayla’s cousin, Samena and it was absolutely fantastic. I have to apologize to my foodies since we were so hungry I forgot to take a lot of pictures. The noodle dish and heirloom tomato dish were great. We also had to try the “New England Lobster Roll”. Although it didn’t measure up to the New England lobster rolls we have had at Neptune Oyster in Boston it was certainly equivalent to anything we have had in New York. The pot stickers were great but we had already eaten too much by the time they arrived but our favorite were the dumplings.

We are getting close to time to touchdown in Alice Springs so one last thing. This was on the back of the seat in front of me. I still have no idea what it means.

Today was supposed to be our day to see Australian animals and we certainly got our fill. We went to the Moonlit Wildlife Sanctuary where they had a great variety of animals. We got to see kangaroos, koalas, wallabies and all sorts of other creatures (most of whom I don’t recall their names). Unfortunately the Tasmanian Devil was in hiding so I guess we will have to schedule a trip to Tasmania to see that critter. Our tour guide, Darrin, who has been amazing (I am not just saying that because he is a follower of my blog and knows where to find the most poisonous creatures that inhabit this continent) took some fantastic photos and has shared them with us on Facebook. My personal favorite is below.

I also got a few shots that I thought you might like to see.

At night we traveled to the St. Kilda area with two other tour members, Mary Ellen and Andrea. At dinner I found out that Mary Ellen is fluent in French (she taught the subject and has spent a lot of time in France). Andrea speaks Italian, French and Spanish. Ugh, I am so jealous. Enough about my insecurities, after dinner we headed to the pier where we were told we could see penguins at sunset.

On our trips the typical scenario will go something like this. We are told of a natural phenomena that will be occurring nearby our hotel. When I go, of course it is the one night (or day) it doesn’t happen. For example in Iceland the boat ride to see the Northern Lights was greeted with total cloud cover. In Austin, Texas I failed to see the bats that reportedly come out every night. The worse episode happened in 2017 when we flew to Nashville to see the solar eclipse only to have cloud cover block our view at the big moment. Knowing that, I was not very optimistic about seeing penguins last night. Much to my surprise the penguins were not aware of my problems and came out in droves. They were very small and incredibly cute. It was very dark so I apologize if my picture is not perfect.

Tomorrow is a travel day so we need to get up early. So this will have to do for now.

When I last left you Patrice and I were getting ready to go to dinner at the home of one of my sister-in-law’s friends.

My brother, Stephen, married an Aussie, Fayla, in January 1972 after knowing her only a few months. Obviously a whirlwind courtship like that would be doomed for failure. Fayla and Stephen remained happily married for 44 years. It took Stephen’s death on July 7, 2016 to separate an incredible couple.

When Fayla heard that Patrice and I would be making our first trip to Australia she became very excited and gave us all sorts of recommendations. Her best suggestion was that we get together with some of her friends and relatives. We were picked up at our hotel by Sam whose wife, Samena is a 1st cousin of Fayla. We had to go to pick up Samena so Patrice suggested I sit in the front. I immediately walked around the car to get into the passenger seat. Oops, we are in Australia, the driver sits on the right. I hurried back to the passenger side and got in. Samena must be a small woman because the seat was drawn very far up. I could not figure out how to move up the seat (I claimed to be very smart). I decided the drive couldn’t be too far so I would just deal with the seat as is. We started on our way when

I then knocked my head with the sun visor. I put the sun visor up in it’s stored position only to get hit again. This repeated itself 3 more times before I finally decided the darn thing was broken and I was going to have to just sit with it in my face. The ride to pick up Samena was indeed short and I did survive. Samena was taken aback by how much Stephen and I looked like each other. She told me it was as if she was seeing Stephen again. Except for Stephen being a couple of inches taller that me, we looked very much alike (yes he was an incredibly handsome guy).

Sam and Samena are a very sweet couple. Unfortunately Samena has a significant hearing issue. Many of the things we said were repeated by Sam in a voice more appropriate for a library. Obviously Samena is amazing at reading lips and that is how she heard Sam instead of us. Of course Sam turning his head to repeat our words instead of looking at the road did make me a bit nervous.

Dinner was at the home of Robin and his wife Helen (a childhood friend of Fayla). Also there was another friend, Faye, and her husband Morrie. It was a fantastic night. In addition to a marvelous home-cooked meal we had some wonderful conversations. Of course we talked about Stephen and the tragedy that took him from us. He died from a horrible disease called Creukzfeldt-Jakob Disease. (https://brainfoundation.org.au/disorders/creutzfeldt-jakob-disease/). He was active and enjoying life in April, started having symptoms in May and then died on July 7, 2016. Sounds horrible? Yes, it was.

Much to my surprise I found out that Sam and Robin are both doctors. We discussed the Australian and US health systems. I learned a lot and found it fascinating to hear what they had to say. I very much wanted to continue that conversation but unfortunately that we will have to leave that to another day.

Next up on our agenda is to see some Australian animals. I will check back tomorrow.

On our trips, I try to learn what life is like for people who live in the areas we visit. I like to avoid tourist traps and instead interact with the locals. On this trip it was lucky for me Patrice forgot to pack some key items so it gave us the opportunity to go to some shops and mingle with the locals. Walking down the street it seemed as if we weren’t in Australia, but rather what might be the next state in the USA. See what I mean:

Last night we had a get-together with our group leader and the other members of our tour. After a brief orientation we headed to dinner. Followers of this blog might remember when we were in Iceland we tried the local cuisine of whale, gander and horse. Last night we had things you don’t usually see in the USA. Patrice had:

And I had:

This morning for breakfast it was recommended I try another local favorite called Vegemite. You are supposed to add it to toast and butter. It was okay but nothing spectacular. Since I don’t like butter on my toast I might just stick to jam and pass on the Vegemite.

Tonight we have some real fun planned. As I think I mentioned before, my sister-in-law is from Australia. She has arranged for us to have dinner with friends and relatives. I will report more on that tomorrow.

We were scheduled to leave LA on March 2nd at 10:55 pm but didn’t take off until 11:41 pm. I was looking forward to our flight because I heard Qantas has an all Australian crew and the ladies from down under are beautiful. As many of you know, my brother married an Aussie (Fayla) and she is beautiful. I have to admit our flight attendants were not my type but Patrice thought they were very attractive.

The flight and the flight crew were fantastic. We were welcomed aboard and given a gift of pajamas to wear.

This was a long flight, 15 hours from takeoff to touchdown. It gave us plenty of time to have two meals (pretty good food), plenty of snacks (I love dark chocolate), watch 3 movies (“A Star is Born” – overrated; “If Beale Street Could Talk” – too depressing; “Can You Ever Forgive Me?” – funny but dark) but more importantly we had wonderfully long naps.

Arrival went smoothly. We passed through customs without incident, picked up our luggage, and were met by our OAT tour guide, Darrin. While waiting for the rest of our group to assemble I wandered over to a newsstand to start to assimilate some of the local culture. I noted the local paper and it was dated March 4th. Now, wait for one second! We left LA on March 2nd at about 11:40 pm and took a 15-hour flight but we arrived 2 days later? How can that be? I know I slept a long time but not two days worth. I asked Darrin about it and he said something about an international date line. I said, no thank you, I’m happily married. He then explained that during the flight it was actually March 3rd for a very brief time then somewhere over the Pacific we crossed into tomorrow and it became the 4th. So the 3rd came and went without me even noticing it. I checked my Fitbit and it said, zero steps for March 3rd. As far as I am concerned if my Fitbit says zero steps on March 3rd, the day did not exist. I looked up famous events that occurred on March 3rd and found essentially nothing. The first Senate override of a President (John Tyler) occurred on March 3, 1845 but other than that, not much. So I am okay with March 3, 2019 not being part of my life and will move on to March 4th without any complaints.

After checking into our hotel we went on a brief walk of the downtown area. Now we are at the hotel and

will soon meet up with our tour companions for dinner. I am quickly running out of gas. after all, we went from March 2nd to the 4th in 15 hours. I deserve a little rest.

Today we are off on an adventure to Australia. Let me rephrase that, TONIGHT we leave on a trip to Australia. Our plane is due to take off at 10:55 pm. I don’t recall ever leaving on a trip that late.

Patrice has long been lobbying for a trip to the down under. Personally I never really cared to go to the place. But with Patrice being so open to traveling to all the MLB parks (let’s see if she will really go to Cleveland, Milwaukee and Cincinnati) how could I decline this wish.

This will be our first trip with Overseas Adventure Travel (OAT) who comes highly recommended by our friends Don and Ginger. So far they seem to have their act together (OAT, not Don and Ginger although I’m sure D&G have their act together too). We have received lots of information and recommendations to help us prepare for our vacation. Our tour guide has been in contact and recommended we read “In a Sunburned Country” by Bill Bryson to help us get familiar with this far away continent.

Let me quote from the book, “Of the world’s ten most poisonous snakes, all are Australian. Five of its creatures–the funnel web spider, box jellyfish, blue-ringed octopus, paralysis tick, and stonefish– are the most lethal of their type in the world. This is a country where even the fluffiest of caterpillars can lay you out with a toxic nip, where seashells will not just sting you but actually sometimes go for you. Pick up an innocuous cone shell from a Queensland beach, as innocent tourists are all too wont to do, and you will discover the little fellow inside is not just astoundingly swift and testy but exceedingly venomous. If you are not stung or pronged to death in some unexpected manner, you may be fatally chomped by sharks or crocodiles, or even carried helplessly out to sea by irresistible currents, or left to stagger to an unhappy death in the baking outback. It’s a tough place”.

Now let’s wait a second. This is what the tour company wants us to read prior to paying them a bunch of money to takes us to, and around, Australia?

I need to go now. I’m going to check to see if we can reroute this plane to Cincinnati. “.